October 9th, 2011

Statistics:

Ive never written on here about my "numbers."  But I have been thinking about them a lot lately.
Based on my type of cancer and the stage at which we found it, I have a 75% chance at surviving the next 5 years, meaning not dying from this or recurring cancer.  These numbers are based on me having the surgery AND chemotherapy.  If I hadnt done the chemotherapy, the numbers are lower.
These numbers are all over the internet, and are concurrent with what my doctor has advised me.
I dont know about you, but knowing that "statisticly" I have a 25% chance at dying before my son turns 7 years old, freaks me out!  It doesnt sound like "good and favorable" odds.
I have a lot I want to do still...and this whole year has somewhat limited me in what I can do, physically and financially.  I makes me angry, really.  But I cant wait to move on from this stage (chemo and weekly dr visits) and start really living...no matter how long it is that I get a chance to do so.
I AM going to do a missions trip to an orphanage in Africa, no matter how I manage to get it done, in the next five years.  I AM going to see the ocean (I still have never..I know thats crazy) with my kids and collect seashells.  I AM going to continue to live for all the giggles and squeals from my kiddos.  I AM going to do the Susan Komen 3-day walk/run next year...and I have a lot of training to do to get ready for it!   And I AM going to encourage my children's relationship with Jesus throughout the next few years, so they know of His love now and forever.
Thats just what is important on my mind today.  Ha, arent I crazy?

Little bit of whats going on this week:
Im allergic to something.  My hands, feet, really whole body is sooo itchy.  I have a rash especially on my hands and feet.  I have had it a little bit for about a month but it starting getting pretty terrible to stand.  Constant itching kinda makes me crazy.  The doctor is thinking that it may be an allergic reaction to the herceptin.  I had to start taking prednisone, and benadryl.  Had to have a Ct scan to rule out a pulmonary embolism, an echocardiagram to check my heart and a 24 hr heart monitor.  All came back ok.  Still a little itchy, and doctor did not give me chemo this week. 
If I am actually allergic to herceptin, it poses a bit of a problem for me.  Because I am Her2+, herceptin is the only drug to use and very important to stop the growth of any cancerous cells.  The doctor plans to continue to give me herceptin for another 9 months.  Her2+ is the most aggressive, fastest growing form of breast cancer, so I would be much better off taking herceptin, than not.  The doctor mentioned giving me herceptin, but also prescribing me prednisone with it.  I will know more next week.